Humbled

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I have to admit that, yes, the glamour of climbing the Space Needle is what made me want to participate in Base2Space, not the cancer research or fundraising. Everything is true, when I found out it was to benefit cancer research I realized I could do this to assuage the personal difficulty I’m having in dealing with all of these young, healthy people who are being diagnosed lately. It’s really been bothering me, prompting appointments to the doctors for screenings and such, but the Base2Space climb didn’t start there. It sure seems to be ending up there, though.
I posted my ‘Wahoo! I’m climbing for cancer!’ post to Facebook and my website with the hope that someone would donate to the cause. I expected that a few people would donate, I know I have donated to friends and family in the past through similar circumstances so I assumed they would do the same for me, but I was surprised by the humbling emotions that came rolling in with my donations.
First, people donated in honor of loved ones who are with us and those who are not anymore. I don’t know why it surprised me to have names attached to my climb, but suddenly it feels like they will be with me on the climb. Suddenly it matters, what I’m doing. I’m incredibly honored to carry their name for my climb and am thinking of making a Base2Space shirt with the names of all the people I have the honor of climbing for- both the ones who I already dedicated the climb to and those who have money donated in their honor.
Secondly, people believe in me. They believe I can climb to the top of the Space Needle so strongly that they’re willing to give someone else money to guarantee that I have the privilege to do so. It makes me see that I’m no joke. People take me seriously and appreciate what I’m doing, or at least believe in what I’m doing. It’s so validating in some way that it makes me a bit speechless with surprise.
I’m humbled by this whole process in a way that I hadn’t anticipated.
If you’re interested in donating, you’re welcome to do so. Here’s the link, again, in case you missed it the first bajillion links. I’m not at my goal yet and can use some more financial support if you are able and willing. I’m not going to be like a PBS drive and don’t plan on hawking it all the time here. I know what it’s like to not have the finances to support something you really believe in or the ability to do so for one reason or another. I also appreciate your positive words, kind thoughts, comments and all that. Really, I appreciate that you read here at all. 😉

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A good friend’s mom passed away unexpectedly and I spent Thursday evening with her, walking down memory lane through our home town. It’s funny how so much changes and it still seems the same. We stood outside her childhood home and remembered the smells and sounds of our shared childhood. The moon just so in the sky, the sound of the train blowing it’s whistle as it rushed through our little town… We headed to our old elementary school and stood on the stairs remembering waiting for girlscout meetings to begin and smelling the back door to the gym smell of soured milk where the food was delivered and marveling at the freedom we had, walking several blocks to school as kindergarteners and first graders (she lived within walking distance of 4, or so, blocks while my mom would drop me with my friend when we overtook her, and I would walk the rest of the way with her). It was so powerful, how quickly in those quiet moment of stillness, observation and letting go and we were right back there. It felt the same as it did in the 1970’s and 1980’s right then. For me it was comforting, for her it was overwhelming, but I loved that night. Sometimes those raw, bare moments are the most honest and we let down all of our walls and get to return to who we were then. She and I picked up our friendship as though we were 20 again and were sharing a dark, little basement apartment. I’d never wish for the trigger of her mother’s passing, but the night in memorial was beautiful, strange, magical, connecting and filled with love and appreciation. Peace to my friend, her mother and their family.

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{Vamping}
Other than that, things are going well. The kids and I have been having fun as we wear down the nub of summer. We all have one week left and are determined to pack it full. I think we are being pretty successful! I’m also doing lots of classroom prep, lots of unpacking boxes, and I’m glad to say that it’s going well. As much as I was dreading the moving process, it’s actually going smooth. Lastly, ever wonder what happened to the novel? I became a grouchy, working mother who didn’t have time to play with the kids and who started snipping at them instead of loving them. I felt tremendous pressure to write for hours each day, so I dropped it for the time being. I’ll get ‘er done later when they’re bigger and don’t want to sit in my lap anymore. For now, I’ll take their bony little butts over my iPad any day- summer or not.
Oh! And I still am weighing in well and getting my running in. 🙂

One Comment

  1. Lesleigh A

    You can do it. You could do it before you knew people were giving you names and donations. You could do it when you first saw it and thought “Hmmm that looks interesting.” Because you’ve done everything else you’ve tried to do on your journey so far…you can do this. 🙂

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