The Real Spring Break

I had a nice spring break but I wore myself out.  It’s like I think I’m not working so there’s no end to all that I can accomplish.  The jokes on me, though, because I headed back to work last week with a major did-too-much-now-I’m-tired hangover.  I took last week off from working out and just focused on clean eating and working, not working out.  In all honesty it was great.  By Wednesday night I was crashing out early so by Friday morning I was fully awake and not tired anymore, in time for the weekend!

Can you spot me? im the one on the right hand side wearing super bright pink. This was the night of Jessica’s birthday so we were all dressed in matching colors without even knowing she was going to make this video for a Zumba competition she is entering! I think this video looks so cool and I actually look like I know what im doing! 🙂

Heading into this week, I just need to stay focused.  Last week I didn’t go off plan at all.  This Sunday, however, I did enjoy some gluten free pizza.  It’s been a long time since I’ve had a slice so I decided to eat two pieces with salad.  Definitely not on Whole30 but so flipping yummy!  This week I’m adding exercise to the mix.  I’ll go to spin tonight and I’ll see about trsday night Zumba with the sub, but I’ll substitute running if need be.

Here we go!  Have a great week!

I forgot.

I forgot.  That statement is enough to drive me up a wall.  As a mom and elementary school teacher, my own children know this statement doesn’t fly with me.  Nothing lights the fire behind my eyes like ‘I forgot’ (with ‘my mom forgot to put it in my backpack’ as a close second.  Seriously.  It’s not your mom’s job to remember your homework!).  But, guess what?  I forgot.

I forgot that weightloss with a clear aim taken at unhealthy fat is so flipping hard!  This is why I chose to be fat for so many year. Being fat is hard, but it seems a lot more fun than denial quite often.  As was the case last year through this past December.  I was almost flippant as I chugged eggnog and tossed back an entire box of See’s Chocolates in almost one sitting.  I thought, “I’m good at losing weight.  I lost 150 pounds.  I’ve got this.”  In went another cookie followed by a carrot with hummus because I needed to stay healthy after all.🤦‍♀️

I forgot that saying no to myself over and over and over as I try to break sugar addiction and bad habits is really un-fun.  I thought I had it beat after the last Whole 30 and then I started this round.  Easter did me in!  All it took was one bag of Cadbury Mini Eggs and I am gone again.  It’s like I’m starting out at square one again.  Sugar addict, here!  It sucks.  I thought this would be easier.

I forgot how much I relied on crutches before and how it really gave me something to look forward to.  Diet Coke.  Fake meat.  Sugar free candy.  A bit of chocolate.  International delight vanilla creamer in my coffee like a big milkshake.  Sour cream.  I miss it all and am wondering what place it really has in my life anymore.  Those crutches easily turn into slip and slides and down I go into Off-the-Wagonland!

I forgot how much my stomach growls and reminds me to eat.  Eat.  Annnnnd maybe you should eat.

I forgot how slowly I lose weight.  I am not one of those gals who goes into a spiral of massive loss.  I don’t lose 100 pounds in a year.  I lose 40 in a good year.  Losing two pounds a month is a good score for me.  I would be totally unwanted on anyone’s team on The Biggest Loser since my percentage would be ridiculously low every week.  It’s April 12th and I’ve been giving it solid effort since the new year and I’ve only lost 14 pounds.  That’s nothing to sneeze at, but I have goals!  I’m seeing changes in my face and in my clothes, but I want the validation of the number.  I’m so frustrated by this that I’ve decided to stay off the scale for the next little bit so I stay focused on health, not weight.

I forgot how tiring it is to diet.  I’m crashing out by 8:30-9:00 lately and sleeping hard!  All that energy has to come from somewhere, though.

I didn’t forget how empowering it is to take control of my life in this way, though.  I see myself differently when I have solid nutrition and fitness.  I feel great.  I’m pretty happy and balanced with the exception of a few of the above mentioned cases of forgetsies.  🙂

Reflecting and Rebooting

I suddenly realized I never posted an official ‘after’ post about Whole30 and here I am about to kick off the second round!  For shame, Tamara!  In a nutshell, I ended up really liking the Whole30.  I do really well with restrictive opportunities.  I’m a vegetarian by choice and was a fat girl who could only shop in very limited stores for ages.  Sometimes I miss the lack of selection.  It was so simple and straightforward…  But I digress.  I guess the limited choices and clear intentions of the Whol30 plan/challenge makes me have to be truly transparent and honest with myself.  It’s not just the food itself, it’s the intention behind the food.  That intention made me super honest and I stuck to the whole30 as though my life depended on it.  I didn’t cheat at all.  I lost elevenish pounds and felt just amazeballs.  

I will fully confess to going further off plan than I intended after round one was officially over.  Peanut butter tagalong cupcake in point…  And tonight I ate fake meat, tortilla chips and yogurt because I know that tomorrow it’s over and I won’t be able to eat any of that at all.  I’m stepping back into the whole30 shoes earnestly, this time.  This time I know it works for me and I’m going to trust the process.  I wasn’t losing fat as fast as I wanted at one point and started restricting calories further before becoming discouraged and giving up for a few days during this window off.  Then I remembered- HELLO?  You just lost 11 pounds!  You have PMS bloat.  Get back on that flipping wagon and get your butt into gear!  So I am.  We will see how much I’ve lost 30 days from now.  If I lose no fat, at least I’ve gained thirty more days of healthy habits.  Cheers!

Btw- I’m starting this round at my weight from this morning of 228.

She’s a Dance Machine

The Zumba bug has bit pretty hard again.  When you find an instructor whom you like it is everything.  I look forward to cardio-dance-Zumba Thursday nights and Sunday mornings like crazy.  This week I was super excited because I could hit another one of Jessica’s classes on Wednesday morning.  I was a little irked last week when a race event took my Sunday class and a school event took the Thursday.  Priorities, you know?!  Then last night I got a message to wear purple and plan to lift a glass at a surprise party afterwards to celebrate Jessica’s birthday, so I did.  

It was funny because not much was different except that we all wore purple and shared the party secret, but we all danced like a team or something.  We moved in the right directions together and miraculously I managed to do the same thing as the rest of the people most of the time!  It was so much fun.  The party afterwards will do a lot for the comradarie and community among us all in the future.  I met some really interesting people last night, some of whom carry pretty heavy work loads like me, and we all shared how this dance class is absolute therapy and joy for us all.  

I’m so happy that I rejoined the gym last summer and am incredibly grateful that I gave dance another shot.  If I could dance with Jessica every day I would.  Guess what?  I can!  Just like I dance with my kids at school I can dance at home.  Today I decided to practice some of the dances and try some new.  The following was an almost 50 minute workout and was a lot of fun!  All of these are from Jessica’s YouTube channel except the last ones that I found on the Fitness Marshall’s YouTube channel.  Have fun!!!

When he backs away after walking in on a serious discussion 😂

cool down: