Gracious
I went running today!
Man, it felt good. I haven’t done a tremendous amount of running this month (cold, wet, YUCK!), so it was a little bit harder of a run than I’m used to. I’ve been working out and keeping my heart rate in the 120-130 range. Today I took my heart rate three different times, and every time it was in the 160’s or 150’s. Bradley, comparably, stayed in the 130’s. We both commented that it’s interesting how different our workouts are, even though we are doing the exact same thing.
Current workout dogma (or Jillian Michaels and a guy at work who knows a guy who…) states that you should hit a high, intense heart rate for a burst- like how you use your body in real life- and then come back down and keep doing that. Like sprints, I guess. I suppose that makes sense. After all, I lost a good amount of weight last year just pounding the pavement around and around my neighborhood as hard as I could.
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My Old Navy order came today. I ordered everything in a size 16 and it all fits just perfectly. Like, just on this side of being slightly too big. That was pretty awesome! I was able to replace all of my jean skirts, finally. They have been out of my size forever and they don’t sell jean skirts anywhere except the Old Navy plus sized section online. This is to be my last one until they come in style for people under a size 16, I guess. Perhaps that is a sign that I am way out of style, but I am a dedicated jean skirt wearer and that is just a fact that the fashion world will have to deal with. It is weird to me that, in a profession where we work with small children, use paint and glue, get thrown up on, wipe noses and have to kneel, squat and get on the floor all the time, that this is a profession where we are supposed to dress like professional business people. I need something to keep me grounded! The jean skirts stay! ๐
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I’m not sure why, but the word gracious has entered my vocabulary in the last two weeks. Like, anytime something happens where you might say ‘OMG!’ or ‘crap!’ I’m heard saying, “Oh, gracious!” like some old lady or something. What is up with that?! I even had a friend from work ask me if that is what I really was saying. Yes. Yes, I am.
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In case you were worried, my evaluation went well, of course. I am not sure why I get my tail all in a twist over that stuff. I really need to have a little more confidence and belief in myself and my abilities. I’m a kind, rigorous and solid teacher. Why I doubt this in the presence of others, I’ll never know. After the evaluation process ended, so did my anxiety. Imagine that.
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I’m at another point in my weightloss project where I don’t recognize myself. I find myself staring in the mirror, again, trying to memorize myself. I am taking lots of selfies, again, and studying them like crazy trying to get to know me again. It’s weird. It’s a lot like when you go down a size. Like, one day those pants seemed just fine, and two days later they look terrible,baggy, gapped and awful! You look at yourself, and, all of the sudden, you can just see it. You’ve made the transition to a different size. That’s my face- I will all of the sudden just hit this place where I see it, and I look different, I get way surprised. So here’s one of the pics- smile and no smile in the exact same position. Weird, huh?
How solipsistic can I be? Ha ha!
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I had all but given up on my diet bet, then I weighed myself after my run to see myself weighing in at 208.5!!! I have been hovering all around 208-209, but if I’m very careful and focused, I might be able to do it… It is possible to get to 207 by late Saturday if I do this right. We will see if I can do it! I may still be a contender!!
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Gracious! That was a lot!