Goals

Sunday Goals

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Last week I made, what I felt, was a pretty intense laundry list of working out. Added to my work week, I was pretty uncertain about whether or not I’d be able to do it. Well, I managed to make my goals- better yet- I surpassed my goals!
Goal: 2 hours on elliptical
Accomplished: 2 hours 10 minutes
Goal: 2 weights workouts
Accomplished: 4 workouts totaling 80 minutes of weights/floor work
Goal: run 2-4 miles
Accomplished: Ran 3.7 miles in 40 minutes
Goal: Bonus walks
Accomplished: 2 walks totaling about 60 minutes of walking & spent the afternoon at a public pool
The grand total is 310 minutes, or 5 hours, 10 minutes of intentional working out this week! I feel pretty proud- and sore.
*
This week’s goals:
2 hours elliptical
3 weight/floor sessions
1 run of any length
Bonus walks
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Yesterday we ran about 2.4 miles on our regular route and I wanted to work some altitude into the day so we went a different route than usual for the last 1.3. The route takes us down a super steep hill and then loops us up a similarly steep hill. We ran down the first steep hill, which was pretty intense. There was a huge amount of joint impact, and I was a little worried about my hips/knees/ankles, but I didn’t really have a tough time or pain and really just enjoyed allowing gravity to carry me down the hill while I worked my legs as fast as I could for the anaerobic power! On the way up the hill, we did a few running intervals, but my heart-rate stayed pretty high the whole time and I didn’t feel a real need to push too hard. It was a great workout that I need to repeat. My thighs and behind are SORE today!
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It just occurred to me that I get worried about working out in my anaerobic zone too much. Remember one of my New Years goals? Yeah. It’s to build muscle. When do you build muscle? Oh, yeah. In the anaerobic zone. What will happen if I build muscle? Oh, yeah. I’ll burn more calories just by having the muscle because muscle burns more calories than fat!
Duh.
I can lose fat through diet and exercise while also building muscle through exercise.
Double duh.
Just exercise. Do it, right? Good things will happen.
Sometimes I’m so silly.

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Benefit number 99 of diet bet:
I don’t know about anyone else, but it takes a real fitness accomplishment for me to post a workout on Facebook without feeling like a complete tool. One of the nicest things about diet bet is that you are all there for the same reason- to lose weight! We are also all there for accountability- why else would you risk money by betting against yourself to lose weight? So the community is incredibly supportive and friendly! I posted this, yesterday (obviously before I finished everything) just to see what kind of response I would get. Tickle me pink, look what happened!
A friend I have made through diet bet (who is one pound away from a grand total of 100 pounds lost – YAHOO, Michael!) hosts a bet every month and he invited me to join the February bet. I’m totally onboard for that, so if anyone wants in on that bet, keep an eye out and I’ll post the details as it gets closer and I learn more.

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I just wanted to post this link to a website that does a really nice job with a calorie burn calculator. Whenever I’m curious, I head over there to double check my burn. I read somewhere that this is a really good one, so I thought I would share it.
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Tamara Shazam is undergoing a makeover… Sneaker peek:

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Coming soon!

My Almost 5K

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I went out today just with the intention of running off some mega calories I consumed at Ben and Jerry’s. I don’t often go off diet, but when I do I make sure to do it exactly in the biggest, most delicious way. So, yes, please to candy bar pie and chocolate crazed deliciousness flavor. It was so rich I was actually one of those people who says, “Oh my, that is just too rich for me,” and then pushed it towards my husband’s mouth. Those people make me feel guilty for finishing my ice cream cone, so please don’t hate me. I’ll be more subtle next time.
Anyhow, I came home and Bradley hemmed and hawed about whether or not he should go running with me (he is losing his extra fat fast!). In the end he chose to save his knee and I headed out with the goal of hitting at least a 1.5. I hit 1.5 and then decided to try for two. But after I looked that last time I just let go. Dan Savage was telling me scandalous things in my ear and I lost track of time, told my body to get over itself and I ran. I ran and ran and ran and didn’t stop. Not once. Not when I ran up the hill, or the next hill, or when I ran up my driveway to get my dog, or crossing the road, or… Ever. I didn’t stop until I hit my porch for the last time and I threw myself on my bench, steam rising from my completely soaked shirt. 2.8 miles in 36 minutes. I ran for 36 minutes and 49 seconds WITHOUT STOPPING.* Me. There is a part of me that wishes I had just continued on around the block one last time so I could finish out the 5k completely, but there is another part of me that is just proud enough and happy to look forward to the inevitable milestone that is bound to happen next week. I can run three miles without stopping now. My 5K is gong to be such a celebration. I cannot wait until the Color Me Rad Race!!! I am so happy that I know I will be successful now. I know I can do it. I kinda just did.

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The first picture is at the beginning, the second moments after I arrived home.
*I have decided that it is most important for me to get miles under my feet more than I need to be fast right now. So I am going slow, yes, but I am going further!

1.75

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Here’s the great thing about having lived a life in fear of physical activity- I was afraid of so much that I have lots of celebrations and milestones that are all kind of piling up now! My body is chock full of opportunities to show me how efficiently it really can work! Add losing weight to that and I feel like I’m crowing about some new accomplishment or milestone every other day! It feels good, though.
Today I have another milestone. I ran 1.75 miles WITHOUT STOPPING! My average mph was a bit over ten (I’m terrible with the math for some reason) per mile and my total run time was 17:03 minutes. A bit over 10 minute mile? Amazeballs! So taking long strides made a huge difference! I remember not so long ago when I ran for 12 straight minutes and made it about half a mile. That was barely a month ago! I still look at that as such a ginormous accomplishment. Running 17 minutes straight and making 1.75 miles is unfathomable. But, I just did it, so I guess not.
(If you read this an hour or two ago, I had all kinds of wrong numbers in here. I tried doing the math for what my mph was WHILE running up the hill trying to distract myself. I got two steps into my equations, couldn’t process and just thought oh! I guess I ran this much this fast BUT I LEFT OFF A QUARTER MILE! Silly ole me.)
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Motivation
When Gigi was a baby I had this horrible dream one night. I was at the Bellingham Bellis Fair Mall over by the Red Robin (for those not in the know, it is a huge parking area that is rarely occupied, so there is lots of free space) and my car wouldn’t start. Of course, it’s the middle of the night in the dream, the mall is closed and no one is around. Gigi was just a baby in the dream too and all of the sudden this guy rides up in a motorcycle with a milk crate tied on the back with bungee cords. He grabs Gigi and I manage to barely get up as he’s stepping away from me with her. He’s mocking me as he backs slowly up to his motorcycle, drops Gigi in the crate and tries to start the cycle. I know that if I run I can catch him, I start running awkwardly, my knees hurt, my muscles burn, I’m almost there. His bike fails and I keep running, but I get so exhausted and I’m so out of practice with any kind of physical activity that my muscles are just apathetic. Tired, failing, I lose my balance and barely brush the edge of her sweater with my fingertips as he rides away, her little dark eyes staring back at me through the darkness. I try to run, but know it’s pointless. And there I am, completely helpless to save her, crying, wondering if I will ever see her again, what will happen to her, to our family, how I will explain this to everyone, and how I am going to live with this for the rest of my life? In the dream I knew that if I had been more physically fit that I wouldn’t have watched her ride away. I could have saved her. If only I could run. Even a little.
Determination
Today I joke that if the movie Zombieland were accurate, while I wouldn’t be the fastest of the runners to get away, I wouldn’t be the slowest either. I would have a chance, however small, because I do cardio and I can run a mile, now a mile and a half, without stopping. While a mile isn’t very far if zombies are coming, I also know that over time my endurance would pick up, that I would get faster, that my body is capable. It’s showing me that right now. I don’t need to succumb to the zombies, to give up. And while I’m being kind of silly about the zombies, I’m dead serious about being so happy to have yet one more tool that can help to take care of my kids. No man is gonna throw my baby into a milk crate! And if he tries, he will feel the wrath of Tam-RAH!
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I have to humbly acknowledge that I am amassing a small readership (small because how can that many people be this awesome, amiright?!). I want to say welcome and thank you for coming. I welcome your presence, your feedback, your questions and comments!

Determination?

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This is really weird.
The not working out. And I’m not trying to be all hyperbolic about it or anything… It’s just, well, scary. And I see the importance of my mindset. When I am exercising, I am keeping the entire goal in my head. When I am taking a break from exercising, it seems, my head also decides to just go ahead and relax all of the rules. Nom nom nom…
I know, I know. PMS. I KNOW!
But talk about the munchies last night! Like, BAD! I ate a totally reasonable dinner. I followed that with a frozen yogurt bar, a bite of leftover birthday cake, a few Jr. mints, a few whoppers and finally I shared a huge bowl of (96% fat free) popcorn. I had a reasonable day, otherwise, but my eating at night felt binge-y and out of control. Like I couldn’t get my brain to shut the heck up about eating. When I look back, I actually stayed right at the precipice of my caloric intake, but I didn’t like the feel of it. I think I’m just finding myself struggling all day every day, fighting this uphill battle where chocolate that is not even in my house is calling to me all the way from QFC. Reminding me it exists. I’m tired of resisting, especially since I’m still not showing progress towards losing weight despite all of my hard work.
I think I might be getting a little discouraged.
So this morning, at my mid-sleep wake up, I decided that I needed to make a goal. If I do that I know that I’ll be more successful just because I’ll remind myself of it and I’ll be disappointed if I don’t make it.
My first goal is to eat clean food today. No more birthday cake. It doesn’t even look or taste good anymore so I will toss it. Second, I’ll have one after dinner snack and call it good. No point in being a good little calorie queen all day only to blow it at night.
If I take it one day at a time I should be able to get through this slump.
Determination, right?

The Weekend Doldrums & Determination

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Each weekend since I’ve started my 2013 weightloss project I have backslid. Like, I start out each Friday at my lowest weight number and end the weekend about two pounds heavier. For a while I thought it was a water issue – it’s always nicer to say it’s water, amiright?!- until the gain was consistently tied to giving into temptation every single weekend without fail, except one – that weekend I stayed consistent and driven and lost. I want that again.

This weekend my goal is to stay on track and hopefully leave one more decade behind by next weekend. And if there is no loss, at the very least, no gain will be much better than gaining those pesky 2-3 pounds back every weekend!

I was spending some time seeking motivation at my favorite weightloss blog yesterday (running for cookies) when I read her musings on motivation versus determination.
http://www.runsforcookies.com/2012/01/difference-between-motivation-and.html
I know it’s mostly just a game of semantics, but for me, it helped to think about my own power as a dieter, exerciser, health seeker and person. When you talk about motive, you’re often looking for external resources to keep headed in the right direction- I have piles of motivational stories and resources in my head for when I get to a tough moment. But it’s my determination that keeps me on track. It’s my determination that sends me walking around the block, that makes me run. It’s my determination that allowed me to only eat half of the donut yesterday instead of the whole donut followed by it’s brother and sister who never got claimed. My determination is what allows me to have confidence, to be to absolute and resolute, that allows me to walk the world and tell people I’m losing a pile of weight. Relying on motivation to pull me through rough moments is almost like not taking responsibility for my weightloss. Motivation gets me excited, determination gives me confidence. I always hear people say, “I’m so unmotivated.” I have said it often. But what we really are saying in that moment is, “I’m not determined so I’m not going to follow through.” Then I get all grumpy because there I am with that blasted two pounds on my butt again!
Yesterday and all last night when I was confronted with temptation, all I had to do was whisper to myself, “Determination.” Guess what? So far it’s Tamara:with all the points and Temptation: 0. Let’s keep it that way, shall we?
Determination.

Presents? For Moi?!

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I have spent a good amount of time reading my fair share of weightloss blogs. You can see a few of my favorites in the links menu to the right here. —->

One of the things I’ve seen fairly consistently is the dangling of the carrot. The external reward. The physical motivator!

My primary motivator is, of course, the time I’m earning back that I get to tack onto the end of my life. Of course, that is only a plan. As Ben Gibbard says, “And it came to me then that every plan is a tiny prayer to father time.” I get to hope, I get to make it as healthy as possible for myself, but I don’t get to choose much else. Because my other favorite quote is this one: “Time truly flies. If we’re lucky, we get to fly right along with it.” Or something like that by my most favorite poet Tyler Knott Gregson. I’m playing for time. I hope I get REALLY lucky and I get to fly through time for a long time. But if I don’t have luck on my side, perhaps good health will hedge things in my direction.

But I wonder… Would losing weight be more fun if pressies were involved along the way? Frankly, isn’t most everything more fun with presents? Like, seriously?!

I’ll admit that the ultimate prize would be to get rid of the surplus flesh once the contents have been evacuated. That is a sincere hope but I’m holding off on getting too excited about that just yet (I bald face lied right there – I’m freaking obsessed with getting a tummy tuck. I just don’t wanna seem vapid or premature!!!). Anywho…

So along the way…
Maybe some new summer dresses?
Or some cute shoes…
A pedicure?
And I’ve already promised myself new boots when I reach my forty by forty goal. Pretty boots. Nice boots. Boots that will last longer than a season.

Don’t hate me but I’m having fun with my diet right now. I’ve got that in-control, power-high thing going on that happens once the diet and exercise become habit rather than a pain, the calorie counting seems like a puzzle rather than a punishment and you rather enjoy stepping on the scale every morning and watching the numbers as they just keep going down. Sorry, but that’s fun.