Whole 30 Like a BOSS

Today marks day number seven of the Whole 30 and guess what?  I’m doing great!  I am so proud of myself, I haven’t cheated by eating off plan on purpose once.  Not once!  And there were opportunities…  Like when I smelled Doritos and had to actively redirect my brain to focus elsewhere.  Or when I came home to Friday night pizza night and I couldn’t participate.  Each time I’ve had to pull up my big girl panties then seek out my satisfying alternative.  They do exist and I’m in shock at how well all of this seems to be going.


When I think about why this seems easy it comes down to me being the kind of person who does really well with defined boundaries.  I like having things and practices on and off the list.  As a vegetarian, I’m used to looking at a menu and having a very small selection.  As a fat girl, shopping was limited to very few stores with very little square footage dedicated to my person.  I had to make do.  Refocus.  Try a different route. 

My replacement hat came in the mail today! Squeee! Congrats to me for losing 5 pounds!

It’s working, too.  I feel good.  I’m not tired or spacey.  I’m not hungry more than normal.  The strangest thing?  With the exception of eggs, it’s vegan.  I’ve always wanted to try being vegan but was afraid to do it.  Now I’m learning that it’s not so hard and the eggs are my least favorite part of any meal.  On top of that, I weighed in at 230 today which means I’ve lost nine pounds since 1/1/18!

I forgot to take a pic of my 230, but I swear it happened more than once! Lol

  I feel so happy to be back to myself again.  Truthfully, I’ve been feeling a bit lost.  My identity seemed in flux and I wasn’t too sure what to think about myself.  I felt myself morphing back into my old self and I felt powerless to her, my inner fat girl.  This fresh start was just the perfect thing to redirect myself with a new plan.  My previous way of doing things kept leading me back through a cycle where I’d be successful for two or three days then I’d trust myself to make smart choices.  That inevitably turned into problematic habit building and I’d end up losing any momentum I got in those three days at the beginning!  This time I feel like I’m back.  For realz!

Thoughts on Whole 30 SWYPO Stuff

I’m almost  finished with day three of my Whole30.  So far so good.  I think my timing for starting is good for me because I’m not having too many cravings, I’m not hungry and I’m not prowling for food.  Could it be that I’m eating right so my body is happy and satisfied?!?!  What a thought!


One thing that I’m sort of struggling with is making sure that my food is whole.  Let me explain.  According to Whole30 plan, we are not supposed to make fancy, compliant pancakes or desserts that replace the ones we like because the goal is to shift one’s entire way of eating.  We want to change habits, not just lose a couple of pounds.  There is this acronym SWYPO which means (and I’m not making this up) ‘sex with your pants on.’  The idea is that having sex with our pants on, while satisfying and meeting our needs, is not nearly as good as with our pants off.  Instead of having sub-par experiences with compromised foods that are compliant in ingredients but not in spirit, instead we aim to enjoy the foods we are eating.  Find new favorites.  You get the idea.  So the other day I was eating spaghetti squash with tomatoes and it was just meh.  I added a tablespoon of cashew cream and it blew my mind!  So good!  It was like vodka sauce!  Later I was in a cycle of self congratulation with myself and realized I may have accidentally SWYPOed!  I started dialing everything back to basics after that and was essentially looking at a plate with squash, lentils, vegetables and never shall they touch!  I couldn’t imagine the author wanted me to do that and I realized the idea isn’t to restrict foods, necessarily, rather explore and integrate whole, healthy foods.  Almost everything is an imitation of something, this is no different.  When I try making Whole 30 brownies is when I need to regroup!

If you’ve spied those sweet potato waffle things on Pinterest and wondered… give them a try. I like them!

Whole 30, Day 1

Welp, I made it!!  I was honest to goodness worried about starting a restrictive nutrition plan on a Sunday with access to my kitchen all day long, but today was a solid success!  I ate the foods I prepared when I got hungry for them and everything went pretty well.

I decided to journal my food a little differently this time.  I’m posting everything I eat to a new Instagram feed, so if you’re wondering what a vegetarian person eating the Whole 30 way consumes, click here and follow!

 

A few things:

  • I need some soy sauce.  Bad.  I bought the wrong kind and it’s guh -ross!!  It’s made with black sesame seeds and is 2x concentrated.  That’s what you get for assuming all soy sauce is created equal at the Asian food market.
  • I also need some almond butter.  It will be a salve that soothes, I’m certain.
  • Plantain chips are about to become very important to me.
  • Cauliflower rice does not taste like rice, it only looks like rice.  Once it’s in your mouth it is definitely cauliflower no matter how much like rice it looks.  Cauliflower is nummy, but it’s good to be aware going in that you can’t fool your mouth that easily!
  • Cinnamon on sweet potatoes is heavenly.
  • I got the sugar bug around 4:00, ate half an apple and it did the trick.  Phew!
  • Cashew cream is easy to make and it actually tastes really good!  Soak a cup of raw cashews overnight in 2 cups of room temp water, pour off the water the next day, add 1/2 a cup of water and blend it up until it’s creamy smooth.  I added salt, lemon and nutritional yeast to make mine more cheesy.  It isn’t going to fool you into thinking it’s cream cheese or sour cream, but YUM!  You won’t care!


I happened to come down with a vicious cold this morning so I sat around in a stupor all day.  I did important tasks like making my bed and drawing in my bullet journal.  Hopefully I’ll feel better tomorrow and can work out.

Clean Eating with Dirty Whole 30

Why is it dirty?  Because if it’s dirty I’m more interested.  Like my music: if I clutch my pearls and gasp with shock, I loooove it!  Calling it the Dirty Whole 30 makes it sound mysterious and luridly licentious even though it is none of those things.  It’s just really clean eating.  Ha!


But I digress.  I’ve been struggling, yo.  For real!  I lost that fiver in January, earned an injury and dialed my focus back so far from Diet and exercise that I actually bounced up to 242 before I settled back down to 234.  I always wonder how much I’d weigh if I managed to avoid all that bouncing up and down the scale… back when I was at my healthiest I ate a lot of raw food.  My plate was filled with fruits and veggies, rarely did I rely on carbs.  I felt good when I ate that way.  I performed well and I’m really having a hard time getting back to that low carb/clean eating way of life.  The Whole 30 seemed to be a really good way of getting back to basics.

In a nutshell, the Whole 30 is a 30 day, fairly restrictive eating plan that is designed to rethink and redesign your relationship to food and your eating habits.  Sugar is the one I’m most concerned about.  I’m certain that I have a keen sugar addiction right now.  I won’t be eating any refined carbs, no sugar, no dairy or animal fats.  The program relies heavily on meal planning and preparation so that when you are confronted with a weak moment, you have something to eat.

I will be allowing a couple of alternates that will hopefully not impact the results.  I’m going to allow eating in between meals.  The plan’s ideal is to rely on three meals with minimal snacking.  Vegetarian food is processed through the body more quickly than a meat eater’s diet.  That means I will get hungry faster and if I want to be successful, I am going to have to plan for that by having some bananas and apples ready.  Another thing I’m going to allow is when my parents come over in a week.  I promised to make posole and I’m just going to enjoy the evening rather than worry about being on a diet and not eating this meal I’ve been planning to make for my dad for a month now!  Additionally, there are some allowances made for vegans and vegetarians by the program author so it is possible to do whole 30 without the animal flesh focus, I’ll just be inclusive of more tofu and eggs.  I think I’ll hate eggs by the end of this.  LOL

Things I am Planning on being Challenged by:

  • Morning coffee- this will be an adjustment.  I can have coconut cream but no sugar.  I will definitely need to experiment with my caffeine in the morning!
  • Night snacking is going to be tricky.  I have a big nighttime habit that is doing me no favors presently.
  • Cutting soda pop- I will still have seltzer water but diet root beer is one of my primary crutches.  Losing that will be difficult.  Not impossible, but it’s going to challenge me.
  • I’m slightly worried that I won’t want to exercise because of the nutrition shift (low energy?).

Things I’m planning on looking forward to:

  • Most people lose between 10-30 pounds.  I will appreciate that.
  • Beat my sugar addiction!
  • Realizing the power of me- I know I can do this!
  • Opening up my palate to more flavors again.
  • Getting healthy!!
  • I’m honestly more excited than worried and that is a very good thing.

One of my favorite things so far is definitely making my whole 30 bullet journal.  Making the pages is helping me to clearly understand what I will be doing for the next 30 days!  My whole 30 will take place between February 18th and March 19th.  Prepare to read a lot about it here!  Ha!


I’ve got this.

Things That Make You Go Hmmmmm…

So.  Official pictures from the My Bettter Half Marathon came in and I’m noticing an alarming trend of getting fatter.  That’s a 40 pound weight gain right there.  The first year was the year I was doing 2016 miles in Run the Year.  I was a machine, running my butt off.  I was in great shape, training like a champion.  The next year, last year, I was coming to terms with my extremely challenging class and was dealing with the stress with a lot of eating.    This year definitely shows that progression.  I’ve gone from curvy/pleasantly plump to fat and I don’t like it one bit.

My Better Half Marathon/10k Year 3


We headed out to Seward Park for our third year running  My Better Half Marathon/10k on Sunday, February 11th.  We ran the 10k version, of course.  Gigi ran like the wind, Jude and I chugged along behind.  I always love this race because it really does make me walk my talk.  I always say I want to celebrate events without it always having to be centered around a pile of food, and this race certainly allows me to celebrate Valentine’s Day without gaining ten pounds!


This race was my maiden voyage since my knee injury that I’ve been babying.  I was fully prepared to cut the race into a 5k if need be, but when I came around for my second loop, I was feeling frisky and fine!  I kept up with my super slow jog (14 minute miles, y’all) and was able to finish the whole run with just about half a mile walking.  I haven’t been able to train with all the healing and resting so it felt GREAT to finish the whole thing and to have run almost all of it!  I did pay in soreness, though.  Wow.


When I got home I made my race schedule for the year and realized how many races I have in March!  I have the Hot Chocolate 15k on 3/4, the Big Climb around the 25th and Shamrock Run 5k on 3/17!  That means I really need to get some training miles in, and guess what the weather is supposed to do on this long weekend, perfect for training miles?  SNOW!  Ha!  Of course!


* I’m still fundraising and am 100 shy of my goal.  If you are interested in supporting me on my climb and cancer research, please donate.  Even a dollar is helpful!

Also, don’t forget-  if you register for an Orca race, use code tamarashazam18 for a 15% discount!  

Hello Miss February

My injury played some serious head games on me.  That twang hit my hip and knee and I lost it- all of my determination, my stamina, my hope.  I just plopped down, threw my hands up and started singing the woe is me tune about how nothing is going my way.  That I’m stopped at every turn and why oh why did this happen?  Yeah.  I had a nice little pity party full of giving up.  I went to the doctors and was basically told to take it easy but I was pretty freaked out.

The Lj’s at Multicultural Night repping our Deutsch roots. 🙂

Anyhow, on Friday I kind of woke up and wondered what the heck happened.  Sure, I had a minor injury, but it was minor.  Minor.  Then I happened to look at some pictures of myself from as recent as last summer, when I thought I looked fat, and I didn’t look fat.  I looked great!  Again: what was wrong with me?  A little disgusted with my attitude, I decided to take stock of my accomplishments:

  1. I lost five pounds.  While I was super disappointed to not lose the nine I wanted to lose through DietBet, I did lose five pounds.  That’s nothing to sneeze at.  Five pounds is great and I should be celebrating, not feeling ashamed.
  2. My exercise was consistent.  I didn’t want to run a bunch outside, but I was getting it done and the work was showing on the scale and in my body.
  3. I have gained 40 pounds since my all time low of 190.  It makes sense that working out is harder for me and will take some adjustment.  I’ve got a lot more moving and shaking on my frame!
  4. I have a big fat roll around my middle that wasn’t there last year.  I really despise it (not an accomplishment, more like a consequence, but somehow it belonged in the list 🤣).
  5. Running is tricky and I have a bunch of races in front of me, but that doesn’t mean I have to run them all.  Some can have distances adjusted and others don’t have to be attended at all.  I have a gym membership and should use it as much as I need to eat the workouts I need to see the outcome I want.
  6. I want it.  Bad.  I want it so bad that I decided I’m truly invested in doing the work that will get the results!


To that end, I decided to go to Zumba today.  I danced wimpy, just to make sure things old go well, and they did!  I didn’t do all the squats or lunges or leaps.  If there was a bunch of jumping, I kind of hopped in place, if that makes sense.  I was pleased to note that I still sweated my butt iff, my heart rate still soared appropriately and I got a good workout without the injury.  I feel like I’m back. 🙂

I’m planning on going to spin/lift tomorrow and Zumba on Thursday.  I’ll see about squeezing something else in, as well.  Here we go again!  I’ll try for four-six pounds this month and we will see what happens. 

The Weigh of It All

Week three and my gameplay hasn’t changed much, but isn’t it funny how your body just adjusts and all of the sudden your gameplay doesn’t have the same impact??  I’ll admit it: I didn’t get out for a run, again, since last Sunday.  I made it to body pump and Zumba, which was great, but the rest of the week seemed to rush by in a freezing, cold, wet blur.  I didn’t feel like running outside much or even waking up and driving through the rain!!  That said, I do realize that to get the results I have to also brave the yucky weather.

I’ve been handed a blessing and curse, though: Injury!  Blessing because it gives me a great excuse to avoid working out.  LOL!  Just what I don’t need.  Curse because I can’t run, body pump, Zumba or spin until I get this diagnosed and in a safe place.  In we fat girl is super happy.  I’ve been feeling tension in my hips, but that is normal for me.  Then I started feeling my knees ache.  Then they started popping.  Finally I was walking up my stairs and they were straight up hurting, my left knee singing super loud.  I decided to get in the bath and when I bent my knee to lift my leg and step in I stretched something that actually made me cry out in alarm, more than pain.  So, off to the doctor’s for me, this week.  Fun, fun. it feels like sciatica meets swollen bursa meets a cartilage issue.  We will see what happens.  Hopefully I still am allowed to run.

  • I still weigh 232.  
  • I failed the night eating goal
  • I didn’t work out as much as I planned
  • I ate within my caloric plan
  • I added walking to my plan with Julie on Friday
  • I made 10,000 steps 5/7 days with the other two days meeting around 8000 steps

This week:

  • Eat on plan again
  • Stop night eating for reals 
  • Try some upper body weight routines out
  • Go to the dr and protect my knees😖
  • Buy a knee brace 😩

Rock Solid

It was gorgeous running weather today!


I had another great week of fitness and fat loss.  I didn’t quite meet my goals, but I definitely took a good bite out of them!  I made it to spin-n-lift and Zumba, but I didn’t manage a good midweek run.  In spite of that, I did manage to get my 10,000 steps every day except one and I did get a good, long run in, as well as a run last Sunday and yesterday.  All totaled, I ran 8 miles.  Not terrible.  

My nutrition is also doing well.  Not eating after 8:00 hasn’t been hard since I tumble into bed sleepy by 7:30.  This weekend I did night eat.  On Friday night I was HUNGRY so I ate some granola by moonlight.  I’ve dialed everything back but I’m still not journaling my food.  I’m finding that I’m somehow able to play the head game for now and it’s working.  Today I weighed in at 232.6, so I’ve lost almost seven pounds since 1/1.  I’m pleased as punch with that.

This coming week I’d like to keep my goals the same:

  • Run thrice, one run needs to be greater than 4.5 miles.  The others can be any distance.  We have a six mile run in a month and a nine mile run in March.
  • Spin-n-lift Monday, Zumba or weights Thursday, toy with the idea of Sunday morning Zumba…
  • Continue fasting starting at 8:00 each evening
  • Continue making smart nutrition choices
  • Keep drinking diet soda- that crutch works for me!
  • Aim for 10,000 steps per day.

    Training Advice for the Not Newbie but Not Experienced Runner

    I recently had someone write to me, asking if I could offer some advice to her as a runner who wants to train for a longer distance than 5k who has a history similar to mine: weight, age and experience wise.  Once again, I must reiterate that  I’m not an expert in anything except my personal experience. What I did worked well for me but should never replace your own common sense or advice from trainers, coaches and/or doctors who know you and your unique situation. With that said…


    I realized that running was getting easier and easier. My run that was supposed to take up a specific amount of time going x distance around my block was getting done faster and faster, and my workouts were getting shorter and shorter. At first I was perplexed as to what I should do, but then I realized the answer was right in front of me: add more distance.  More distance will lead to a longer workout, and that is how I became a distance runner.

    My initial goal was simply to run a 5K. At that time, running for a whole minute was impressive to me. A 5K was beyond phenomenal.  After I was able to run for 20 minutes straight, I focused on the distance of 3 miles.  I did this by running as much as I could, then finished the 3 miles with walking. My thought was that if I could at least finish the distance, eventually everything else would speed up.  It does.  Slowly, for sure, but it does happen.  That said, here are my basics for gearing up for a long race:

    • Plan on spending a lot of time running.  This may seem obvious but it’s also not. You think that you’re being generous with yourself when you plan to run 9 miles on a Saturday, but your family has to live without you for three hours on that Saturday as well. Add to that all of the Saturday chores you have and suddenly that 9 mile run doesn’t seem like you’re giving yourself a break as much as you’re giving yourself a job.  Running longer distances takes a ton of time and energy. It should go without saying, but for some reason we think that it’s going to be easier to accommodate.  When I disappear, my family howls. LOL
    • Realize that not all of your runs need to be long, distance, training runs.  I thought that once I reached a new distance, that had to be my go-to training distance…  but I didn’t have time to run six to ten miles a day!  Now I know that I need to train around a distance, not always run the same every time.  Diversity is good.  These days, my ideal is what I call a 3-6-9 week.  Basically, that means I work up to running one of each distance per week.  It keeps me in condition but also allows me to have a life with other hobbies than running.
    • Run where you feel safe: People talk about running as though is gives them a ticket to the world.  They savor new runs and new views…  but some of us don’t.  When I am trying out a brand-new distance (beyond 13 miles, at this point) I like to try it out as close to home as possible.  I liked the security of knowing the exact distances I was adding as well as the security of having a clean bathroom nearby and the ability to quit the second things got too hard for me.  I remember when I was training up to six miles I made Bradley run the smallest loop near our house a bajillion times with me because it was where I felt safest.  Later I found out it’s always his least favorite part of our entire run because it has the most traffic, but he never complained.  LOL!
    • Diversify your running routes: this is after you feel safe running that new distance, of course.  I have several different loops near my house and a few trail runs that allow me to add hills of varying inclines and declines so races don’t kill me with their hills.  I also live on top of a hill; like, there’s a water tower less than two blocks from me kind of hill.  If I run, there are always hills involved!
    • Train up to your miles slowly.  Yes.  Most likely you could go out and run a whole half-marathon today, but how would you feel during mile 11 of that run?  How would you feel the following week?  My general rule of thumb is to start out with a three mile run then add one mile per week to it as my long run.  Over time, I work up my miles to that 3-6-9 and throw in another workout or two for diversity (lifting, spinning, hiking, Zumba).  If you add too much mileage too fast, you’re also probably adding an injury to your plate.
    • Adding miles can mean slower miles: When I add distance I get tired.  My muscles wear out.  There’s a growing and strengthening process that needs to happen.  Just allow yourself grace.  These days my miles are slow because I’ve gained some pounds, so running is harder.  That’s changing. 😉 
    • I like to complete the race distance before the race: Many training programs advocate getting within two miles of your goal distance then tapering until the race day.  I like to train to the distance then run it at least two or three times before the actual race.  If I don’t, I start my races jittery and full of anxiety, lacking confidence and just not in the best headspace.  Running it a few times beforehand allows me to relax and just enjoy the race rather than worrying I won’t make it.
    • Consistency is key: I believe in keeping my muscles warm.  What this means to me is that I need to run often.  It doesn’t have to be far, but it needs to be a few times per week.  The second I step away from that I get lethargic, slower, tire easier, injure easily and don’t love running as much.  The other positive side effect for me is that when I run regularly I don’t deal with depression or anxiety as much.  I love that!

      Have fun training!  I just signed Gigi and me up for another race: The Snohomish Women’s Run.  We are running the 10k and the race was ‘only’ 45, but with a hoodie and medal, I don’t think that’s too bad.  The theme: Nevertheless, She Persisted.  Oh, yes!  We will!