Many moons ago, on this blog, I wrote about my superstition- that if I got rid of my bigger clothes that I would need them shortly. Last time I lost a significant amount of weight, I immediately expunged all of my clothes as a symbolic gesture that I would never again return to those sizes. Within a year, I was busting out of my 18’s and re-purchasing size 20’s, 22’s and, finally, 24’s. I told myself that sizes were changing- certainly, I was not blossoming weight again! But I was. I had to eat some humble pie and buy a few new things, but mostly I decided to lose weight again.
So I did. I lost a bunch of weight. As I shrunk out of my clothes I would get rid of stained stuff or things that were clearly out of style, but my core I kept: jean skirt collection, a pair of jeans or pants I like, a few neutral shirts… But the collection grew rapidly and more copiously than I thought it would. Initially I thought it would fill a plastic bin or two, but it took over my closet, my garage and just bugged me. Then I realized that when and if I ever did/do need those clothes again that they are going to be just as out of style as the tshirts and tops that I was already getting rid of. The pant legs flare, the waists are short… You get the idea.
So I bit the bullet this weekend and organized all of the clothes by size. I’ve asked a few friends if they would like a few clothes that might fit them today or that might fit them as they make their way down the size charts. I’m getting rid of them, regardless. They don’t fit into my life or on my body any longer.
It feels weird, but I honestly will be surprised if I ever get above a size 18 again. I’m committed to my health and this, honestly, feels like one more way of letting that part of myself go. I loved these clothes. It’s hard to let them go in the same way it’s hard for me to clearly see myself again. I hope their next owners love them as much as I did, and I hope that saying goodbye to these clothes helps me to turn the corner and say hello to the newer version of myself. 🙂